This is one of my favorite quotes… thought it would be a good one to end out the month of March with. Another month and I’ll be in the air on my way to spend a summer in Wyoming.  

“The only lasting freedom from self-consciousness comes from a profound awareness that God loves me as I am, not as I should be. He loves me beyond worthiness and unworthiness, beyond fidelity and infidelity. He loves me in the morning sun and the evening rain without caution, regret, boundary, limit or breaking point; that no matter what I do, He can’t stop loving me. When I am really in conscious communion with the reality of the wild, passionate, relentless, stubborn, pursuing, tender love of God in Jesus Christ for me, then it’s not what I’ve got to or I must or I should or I ought; suddenly I want to change because I know how deeply I am loved.” -Brennan Manning

Here’s a picture of that dumb squirrel I was talking about earlier… the one who was naive enough to run after an empty nut shell. That’s like me chasing after an empty snicker’s wrapper? Who does that?

I went down to the Art Barn with Jess and Corban earlier this afternoon. Corban took Ceramics I last year, so he was heading down to do a little throwing on the pottery wheel. I went down there with him and grabbed a ball of clay and a wheel. It’s been a few years since I’ve touched a pottery wheel… it felt good to feel the wet clay move between my hands and to see it take shape depending on where I put my hands and fingers. It took me a long time to remember how to center the clay. It was frustrating at first. I had forgotten how much of your weight you have to put into holding your arms still and keeping your hands firmly around the clay while the wheel spins.

I didn’t end up making anything – the clay got too wet to form anything after about an hour of me trying to make a bowl then a mug then a plate then a bowl… :)

It was fun though. It definitely takes a while to get back into it. Pictures soon to come.

I’m tired. I crawled into bed around midnight last night after hanging out with a couple of guys. It was good to just sit and talk and have some guy time. I had a hard time falling asleep… I think I finally dosed off around 1:00 a.m. I woke up again around 5:30 and just tossed and turned until 7:00. You ever get that churning feeling in your stomach and you just can’t sleep? That was me last night.

It’s all good though. I’ve had my first two classes already… three more to go today. Around 4:30 p.m., I’ll be working with Joey on our business management project in the Mills computer lab. And from 7-9, I’ve got parking duty in the North Lot. I just hope it doesn’t rain (pray hard).

My parents should be here right about now… they’re coming into town for the weekend. I’m excited to see them.

I’m reading Frankenstien by Mary Shelley right now for my CHOW 2 class. For some reason, I was vaguely familiar with the story, but I have never read the book myself. We’re watching an old black and white version of Frankenstein in the class, and on Monday we have to write a 2 page journal comparing the book and the movie. It’s going to be interesting. It’s been interesting already to read how Mary Shelley portrays Frankenstein as being more of an intelligent and coherent monster that has been brought into the world, while the film portrays him as being more of a dumb and violent brute. I’m not quite far enough into the book to make a final opinion, but it’s been interesting to read and watch the story at the same time…

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the story, you should read it. It’s a classic. You can read it on this website – Frankenstein.

[Note: I debated with myself as to whether or not I should include a picture of Frankenstein's monster. I figured it might prove to be "educational." My apologies to those of you who are "faint of heart" ... as Mary Shelley put it, the story of Frankenstein will "awaken thrilling horror - one to make the reader dread to look round, to curdle the blood, and quicken the beatings of the heart."]

We lost our volleyball game tonight… 0-5 this season.

Not my calling in life.

Until next season…

Where am I currently?

In the library… I just finished filling out my income taxes, and I’m getting ready to send those off. And then I’m going to try and knock out FAFSA sometime tonight. And maybe if I have time later, I’ll be doing a little Finite Math homework. I have a volleyball game at 8:00 p.m. So far we’ve been really consistent with our playing… we’re 0-4 right now. Tonight is our last game. You got to love precision.

I took my Opa and Oma’s dog Milly for a walk through Fairyland neighborhood tonight… it was such a beautiful evening. It’s been an amazingly gorgeous day. A lot of the trees on the mountain are starting to blossom, and the days are starting to feel more like spring… 60-70 degrees, crisp fresh air, and sunny. It felt so good to get out and off campus, even if it was just five minutes down the road.

Note to self… I have to pick up a 50 lb bag of bird seed from Abe Shavin Hardware tomorrow or Thursday and drop it off at my Opa’s house. Don’t let me forget.

I thought I’d share a few thoughts, compliments of Oswald Chambers. From my understanding, the devotional for today centers around the verse John 3:30.

“He must become greater; I must become less.”

Maintaining the Proper Relationship

. . . the friend of the bridegroom . . . —John 3:29

Goodness and purity should never be traits that draw attention to themselves, but should simply be magnets that draw people to Jesus Christ. If my holiness is not drawing others to Him, it is not the right kind of holiness; it is only an influence which awakens undue emotions and evil desires in people and diverts them from heading in the right direction. A person who is a beautiful saint can be a hindrance in leading people to the Lord by presenting only what Christ has done for him, instead of presenting Jesus Christ Himself. Others will be left with this thought— “What a fine person that man is!” That is not being a true “friend of the bridegroom”— I am increasing all the time; He is not.

To maintain this friendship and faithfulness to the Bridegroom, we have to be more careful to have the moral and vital relationship to Him above everything else, including obedience. Sometimes there is nothing to obey and our only task is to maintain a vital connection with Jesus Christ, seeing that nothing interferes with it. Only occasionally is it a matter of obedience. At those times when a crisis arises, we have to find out what God’s will is. Yet most of our life is not spent in trying to be consciously obedient, but in maintaining this relationship— being the “friend of the bridegroom.” Christian work can actually be a means of diverting a person’s focus away from Jesus Christ. Instead of being friends “of the bridegroom,” we may become amateur providences of God to someone else, working against Him while we use His weapons.

It’s late, and I’m exhausted… it seems like it should be the opposite after coming back from a break. Somehow it never works like that. I’m heading to bed in a little while, but I wanted to ask for prayer for my Oma and Opa (my grandparents). I found out a little earlier tonight that they haven’t been doing well (for reasons I won’t take the time to explain)… it’s hard seeing them fade. I would ask for prayer just that God would watch over them and that His will would be done in His perfect timing. That’s all I can ask.

I have a business luncheon that I’m going to tomorrow at 11:45 a.m. It should be good — it’s being hosted by Northwestern Mutual Financial. At this point, I’m trying to make the most of the opportunities to pursue career options… even if that means just going to a business luncheon and hearing more about the opportunities out there.

I’d ask for prayer for myself too… I’ve had a lot on my mind, and it’s been hard to remember to just take it one day at a time.